While serving as Zachary's wingman at the beach the other day, I found myself involved in a discussion about blogging. One mom started off saying she didn't read blogs. (I mean, really! Who has the time for that?) And if she did, she sure wouldn't bother with a blog about raising kids. (I mean, I'm already living that life, yknow? Why rehash it?) And if she did read blogs about raising kids, she sure as hell wouldn't want to read a daddy blog. (I mean, what am I supposed to read about? Seeing their kid a half hour per day and griping about changing diapers?)
Instead of following my instincts and slapping the bitch, I found myself feeling conflicted. Naturally, I was disappointed that this is this woman's experience, one that is shared by too many other parents with absentee partners. However, I also wanted to wave my snot and urine -stained shirt at her and say, "Bitch, I'm right here. And there are tons of other fathers out here, whose hands I would gladly shake were I a little less sticky. How's about taking a stroll outside the gated community of Head-Up-Your-Ass Estates?"
Look, I know daddy bloggers aren't the usual case.
Not by a long shot.
We are a stark minority, so much so that we are often lucky to just be lumped in with the mommies when it comes to parenting. Not every dad has the option to care for his kids as much as we do, or gives much of a shit about washing clothes, weathering tantrums, packing lunches, and the usual crudgery that punctuates parenthood as we might. Fewer still are the men who will make the time to write about it, with vowels and everything.
Nevertheless, it gives me a hot pain in the nethers to spend everyday with my boy, taking care to listen to this and wipe that and pry apart the other things. And then I walk into a Target and see this on a onesie:
This, dammit, is why we need daddy bloggers.
Saturday, June 26, 2010
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2 comments:
A most excellent work of love and art Kacy. I had no idea a science major could be such a gifted writer
Obviously your right brain is very well developed as you are also gifted at making lovely european beers. Nalni has talked about you and Lesley with such joy for almost 7 years now. You and your son are a crack up and I am so glad you and Lesley have this opportunity to experience these many moments with Zachary. Ihe greatest happiness in my life was raising and sharing Nalini's childhood with her. Unfortunatly her biological father couldn't care less is she lived or breathed. Much to his loss.
I will enjoy this blog very much. It will give me great joy.
Love and Hugs to all three of you,
Nalini's mom
Regardless of the topic your commentary is creative, insightful and entertaining. You speak to the emotion if not the experience of Dads, most of whom run screaming from what you have embraced. Your son will be benefited for his lifetime because of the record of the positive/humorous aspects of the terror/misery of making a child into a functional and happy person. Keep us informed and the narrative intact.
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