Zach Crawls

I have suspected that my son has been mobile for a few days now. However witnessing his stealthy quadrupedal kinesis in person, let alone capturing the event on film, has thus far eluded me. It all started harmlessly enough: Zach would be sitting peacefully in the center of the room on a blanket while I sat a few feet away with my laptop checking my email. An instant later, Zach is playing with a fork and the electrical outlet.

How the hell...

Naturally, I assumed the dog had picked him up and moved him. Either that, or Zach had somehow ripped a hole in the space-time continuum and teleported to the cupboard containing the cleaning materials and knives. Simply unthinkable was the possibility that my son, my BABY, of a mere 8 months of existence had so rapidly developed his motor skills and triumphed over his epic battle against ataxia.

In the minutes that followed I would rescue my son from his blatant attempts at suicide no less than 7 times. I would piously return him to the safety of the center of the blanket in the middle of the floor, an astronomical 6 or 7 feet away from any potential life threatening mischief. Yet somehow, every few seconds I would find him in some new unexplainable location, like digging through the trash, sticking his hands in the toilet, or eating dog food.

So there I was, sitting on the couch with our friend Annie, when I saw the impossible happen:

My son crawled.

Sounds impossible, I know. I wouldn't believe it if I hadn't seen it with my own eyes (didn't we just bring him home from the hospital like, a week ago?) but here is the mocking evidence of my ignorance to the passage of time